Friday, April 14, 2006

Couldn't Have Said It Better Myself

Dear President Bush:

I'm about to plan a little trip with my family and extended family, and I would like to ask you to assist me. I'm going to walk across the border from the U.S. into Mexico, and I need to make a few arrangements. I know you can help with this.

I plan to skip all the legal stuff like visas, passports, immigration quotas and laws. I'm sure they handle those things the same way you do here. So, would you mind telling your buddy, President Vicente Fox, that I'm on my way over? Please let him know that I will be expecting the following:
  1. Free medical care for my entire family.
  2. English-speaking government bureaucrats for all services I might need, whether I use them or not.
  3. All government forms need to be printed in English.
  4. I want my kids to be taught by English-speaking teachers.
  5. Schools need to include classes on American culture and history.
  6. I want my kids to see the American flag flying on the top of the flag pole at their school with the Mexican flag flying lower down.
  7. Please plan to feed my kids at school for both breakfast and lunch.
  8. I will need a local Mexican driver's license so I can get easy access to government services.
  9. I do not plan to have any car insurance, and I won't make any effort to learn local traffic laws.
  10. In case one of the Mexican police officers does not get the memo from Pres. Fox to leave me alone, please be sure that all police officers speak English.
  11. I plan to fly the U.S. flag from my house top, put flag decals on my car, and have a gigantic celebration on July 4th. I do not want any complaints or negative comments from the locals.
  12. I would also like to have a nice job without paying any taxes, and don't enforce any labor laws or tax laws.
  13. Please tell all the people in the country to be extremely nice and never say a critical word about me, or about the strain I might place on the economy.
I know this is an easy request because you already do all these things for all the people who come to the U.S. from Mexico. I am sure that Pres. Fox won't mind returning the favor if you ask him nicely.

Thank you so much for your kind help.

Sincerely Yours,

One of the many Forgotten Taxpayers

1 Comments:

At 9:30 PM, Blogger Baby Punk said...

I have nothing whatsoever against Mexicans or anyone else coming to this country and becoming productive members of our society. However, that is not the case and we all know it. Let's stop deluding ourselves. The days when the pitiful masses of the poor and hungry washing up on our shores are gone. Now we get criminals of all kinds with very few quality persons crossing the borders. Did I hear that Bush wanted to make the illegal aliens into instant citizens?! You gotta' be fucking kidding me? All because they will do the jobs that most citizens won't do? How about they won't do it for fucking peanuts Mr. Bush. Why would any citizen want to work a slavish job for minimum wage with no benefits? Is that what being born in this country means nowadays? No wonder the welfare systems are overloaded and under funded! I'm sure the average citizen would find working even the most unappealing job, a decent alternative to welfare and the like, if there was some future with said job. These illegal aliens take the jobs because it's 100% better than living where they came from! The businesses are also to blame for this and should be fined and publicly chastised for their practices. Maybe if people (citizens) realize that their landscaper is using slave labor with illegal aliens, they will be less likely to use that business next time. These illegals do not pay taxes! Citizens do pay taxes! And last time I heard, my taxes pay those high Government salaries! Do the fucking math!

 

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